Free PDF , by Alice Miller
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, by Alice Miller
Free PDF , by Alice Miller
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Product details
File Size: 564 KB
Print Length: 224 pages
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company; Reprint edition (August 17, 2006)
Publication Date: August 17, 2006
Sold by: Amazon Digital Services LLC
Language: English
ASIN: B001VLXNAQ
Text-to-Speech:
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Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#231,237 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
In October 2013, I awoke with suicidal thoughts. I had been drinking 1 liter of vodka every day for several months. Something within me enabled me to take myself to the hospital, where I was admitted to the psychiatric unit. There, I detoxed from alcohol. I as transferred to a chemical dependency treatment center; I read The Body Never Lies and Free From Lies. Through reading both of these books, I as able to discover the root of my anxiety, depression, addiction, and, ultimately, suicidal ideation. Alice Miller's writing made me realize that I was not to blame. I was not a "bad seed," as I had been led to believe by my mother. Depression was my body's way of coming to my aid -- of insisting that the truth be heard and processed. Through journaling and many conversations with my peers in treatment, I was able finally to love and protect myself, as I had never been loved and protected before. The persons to whom I should have been able to turn for protection and empathy, I instead had to fear and mistrust. It is extremely freeing to finally attribute my self-destructive behavior, mental illnesses and addiction to abuse. Alice Miller's work changed my life, and I believe I would be dead were it not for reading these books. I have recently enrolled in college, and my goal is to earn my bachelor's in psychology, then master's, and eventually become a psychotherapist. Rest in peace, Alice. You had a miraculously positive impact on the world. I wish you were still here so that I could email you or talk to you. Love, Marc
As a survivor of child abuse, I have often turned to her writings. But somehow this title escaped me.I officially resigned from my faith of more than 20 years about a year ago for a number of reasons. The demand that my continued pain was my fault because somehow I was not praying enough or correctly caused me to feel cursed with toxic shame. Then, there were the demands that I not only forgive my perpetrators but to pray for them was just beyond my ability to accept. The only means that I could maintain any sense of dignity was to resign from "all of that (religious) self-righteousness."It was after this resignation that I then discovered this book. And, felt acknowledged as a noble being rather being forced to live in the shadows of the sins of my perpetrators. It was their sins & they did their best to convince me of that.ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!
I thought this was an interesting approach to exploring the impact of a parent's abuse on the child using examples of famous authors. However, I thought it was repetitious. It could have been half as long or less and conveyed the same points.Also, I think that there were a number of conclusions drawn or at least suggested, that had no evidence to support.Do I believe abuse by parents harms children? Absolutely. Do I believe that when a person denies the abuse they suffered at the hands of their parent it is more harmful than working through it and acknowledging it? Absolutely. In fact, I believe that too many adults allow their parents to continue to abuse them. I also believe that sometimes, adults need to completely cut ties with an abusive parent who is unable to stop behaving ways that harm them.I appreciate Alice Miller for sharing this perspective, helping to raise awareness and letting readers know it is okay to acknowledge the harm their parents have inflicted.
Arrived quickly and as listed. I love this book. Alice Miller is a gift for those that come from Abusive Childhoods and need more answers than 'Just forgive your Parents' - in some childhoods this is impossible. Understanding we can live fulfilled lives and lives that are 'healthier for our bodies and minds' by releasing ourselves from the Poisonous Pedagogy and the 4th Commandment (which is really emotional blackmail) and divorce our abusive families to finally feel the inner and body peace we've all longed for. Our bodies literally get sick from holding the lies, abuse, expectations and shame of our families. When we can finally tell the truth and step away from this emotional blackmail; our bodies and minds heal. Brilliant and Important Psychology for the 21st Century.
This book is intense. It flies in the face of traditional thought and contradicts my own attempts to resolve the feelings I've carried from my abusive childhood. Yet my feelings weren't resolved, and Alice Miller's work helped me understand why. I've given up a good bit of my life trying to get the attention and understanding that my (now deceased) parents didn't give me, in either childhood or adulthood. I'll now be looking for a way to acknowledge those feelings and grow beyond them.
I had already realized that I experienced a cruel and neglectful childhood upbringing at the hands of self-absorbed narcissistic parents. Finally, at the age of 47 with the help of a family therapist I was able to reprocess my family-of-origin experiences from my adult point of view, armed with family systems knowledge that I had never been exposed to. As a result, I was able to eliminate the unhealthy shame and guilt which I was unaware that I still carried from childhood. Slowly,, my depression disappeared and has never returned. This therapeutic experience finally enabled an SSRI to have its intended effect. I had tried unsuccessfully for many years with many so-called CBT therapists to get better. Not one of these self-professed experts ever delved into my family-of-origin experiences. What I love about this book is the emphasis on determining your own truth. And how can you possibly do that without examining your personal history as far back as you can remember, and if possible, with the help of family and friends? It is well worth the effort!
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